Quiet.

 

Quiet - can be defined as “making little or no noise” and “being carried out discreetly, secretly.” 

 

Quiet can bring up lots of emotions. 

 

And people feel differently about it… even the same person can feel differently at another time. 

 

For some, quiet sounds like peace. The way they like to spend time after they have been “on”  all day.

 

For others, quiet sounds like something to avoid. It can feel like loneliness, forgottenness, and maybe even punishment resulting from a misstep. 

 

What comes to mind when you think of “quiet”? 

 

Currently, this is a season of “quiet” for me. 

 

Please understand me; this is not a slow season for me, and it does not mean easy or straightforward, and I am certainly not bored. There is lots of work and other demands competing for my time. However, there is still a solitary, quiet feel to it, and it stands in contrast to earlier seasons where I have been surrounded by other people, other voices, other schedules, and demands from sun up to sun down.

 

My children (whom I am incredibly proud of, and you can read more about here) are now at their respective universities and doing the good hard work of creating their own lives, so my life looks different. 

 

Also, professionally, I’m working on projects currently in a solitary phase. It is just me and the quietness, for long hours on end, pushing it forward. I’m looking forward to someday sharing it with others, but it is now quiet work. For now, this work must be done hidden away from the view of many others. 

 

Are these days quiet for you, too? 

 

For some, it is quiet now because their kids have transitioned from a summer routine to a fall one. The bittersweetness I saw conveyed through countless parents' posts on social media this past week with the return to school. The house is now quiet; the quiet before the fall semester activities ramp up.    

 

For others, there are loved ones that won’t be coming home. In this instance, the quietness, the missing piece, and the empty space resulting from loss will never fully be forgotten.

Or maybe your current reality is a season in life with too much noise, and you are finding yourself longing for quieter. Maybe you are even feeling guilty about this longing for quiet but craving it just the same. I remember seasons like that. I’m sure I will experience this again. 

 

So, consider this: How are things currently for you on the spectrum from quiet to loud? 

 

And then ask yourself, how do you know?

 

If things are NOT quiet for you, when was the last time you had a season marked by quietness?

 

And if you are longing for quiet, why?

 

I believe we all need periods of quiet. 

 

And quiet, like the winter when plants go dormant to conserve their energy and prepare for the next season of growth. We can focus on the lack of visible growth or the absence of blooms, or we can recognize the incredible process that is happening in a quiet, hidden way. 

When we get quiet, we can hear what we think. 

 

We can recognize what is essential for us and discern the right next step for us. 

 

Otherwise, the noise and other things clamoring for our attention can drown this out. 

 

As I sit here writing to you from my quiet home, I consider the next time life and laughter will fill it – this weekend! I am also thinking about the peace that can come with quietness. When I am quiet with myself, there can be grief with silence, too. It stands in contrast to how things “were” and can make us wonder if this is “good?”, “Normal?”, “Right?”, because it is different,

 

So, these are the three things I have been reminding myself of to help me embrace this “quiet season” and what is coming. I’ll call them the “Get quiet and”.

1.  Get quiet and curious. Whether things are quiet or you long for it, make it happen. Take time to get quiet and create space to be curious in whatever way you can. Ask yourself, what do I want to see ahead? How would I like to come out on the other side of this? How can I lean more into what makes me curious that I could lose lots of time thinking about? What do I want to learn more about or be more about? 

   
   
   

2. Get quiet and alone. 10 min quiet and alone. Meditate, pray, observe your thoughts. There is so much evidence that 10 minutes a day of quiet meditation can rewire our minds and positively impact how we show compassion to ourselves and others. 

   
   
   

3. Get quiet and honest. Get quiet and honestly reevaluate where you are. Don’t hide. If you are overfilling your days, what is motivating this? What is this activity helping distract you from? If you are avoiding adding things to your schedule, the very things that align with your values and would fuel you, why? Don’t hide from what makes you wake up. And consider if you are numbing with things that can make you psychologically “fall asleep.” Lastly, don’t hide from the ones who love you and, most importantly, yourself. 

   
   
   

I am excited about this new quiet season, the personal and work goals I have set, and the new opportunities I see and feel rising. 

 

But of course, I am also afraid. 

 

We all crave familiarity, and when we go through change and differences, we can self-sabotage to return to what is familiar. Let's be more honest and open about what we want and need. 

 

Let’s make the time to get quiet so we can know what these things are and be ready to recognize and welcome them. 

 

How about you? Are there any “get quiet” strategies you have found that work? 

 

I look forward to your ideas on welcoming and benefiting from quiet.